An Extra Special Bitter Rivalry: YADBB's Election

Bedad it's early. Tell the truth, I'm a bit fuzzy today after sampling a dozen beers last night with the lads and --c'mere 'til I tell you something funny-- I had this crazy dream where despite repeated abuses of power and enviro-trashing, we elected the Lego-haired robo-Steve to a thundering majority. Crazy, right?

*pause*

WE DID WHAT?!?!?!

Well, it's post-election hangover time (figuratively and literally) and as I sit wool-gathering with a cuppa of Bushell's, it's also time to dissect the beer pairing for last night's electoral frivolities: a sampling of every last Bitter in BC!

That I could find.

Last Wednesday.

A last minute delivery came by float-plane thanks to @GingerLiz, but other than that, the lineup of beers that faced off on Monday night are all readily available given a modicum of footwork. Notable absences include Big River Brewing's ESB (mentioned by @janteweats as being among the best) and Granville Island Brewing's Bitter, which is receiving high praise so far. Why're they missing? Well, both are only available at the brewery, and while that's not a disqualification (Blue Moon hem-hem) it just made it impossible to get our hands on them for an on-Island tasting. But first, let's set the bar.

As it turns out, we're setting the bar rather low. Fuller's ESB is a old favourite of mine, but when I did a little research to determine how it sat in the ESB lineup, I discovered that the judging guidelines contra-indicate for comparing other bitters against the Fuller's floral, malty profile. Wait, "judging guidelines?" Like I'm going to pay attention to those. It's time to stack the Supreme Court.

Opinion was mixed, but the Fuller's tastes like an old friend. Hum. that sounds unnecessarily dirty. It's true though: this is a very familiar, English-y beer, and will appeal to fans of Wychwood, Black Sheep and the like. Light fruit, bread and toffee tones: tastes like eating the world's blandest fruitcake.

Our first BC brew to take a bow is from Spinnaker's: Mitchell's ESB. Frankly, much like the election, I'm braced for faint disappointment. Nothing against Spinnaker's as an establishment, but their Blue Bridge Double IPA resembles other single IPAs in the same way that the structure from which it takes its name resembles the Golden Gate Bridge. I'm expecting it to be thin and vapid and, unfortunately, this isn't Canada's Next Top Model.

But the Mitchell's surprises by being... not bad! A bit too fizzy, but fairly true to the style, and I bet it'd be nice in-cask. Verdict: worth a try if you're at the pub itself.

Next up is Swan's ESB. I tend to forget about Swan's a bit. Sometimes you can get their bombers everywhere, sometimes you have to go right to the source. I'm curious to see whether the cask they're running at Tres Fantastico helps spread the word and gets them to step up their game a little, although their Coconut Porter is an excellent beer that nobody else does. Would you also seek out their ESB?

Well, maybe. It's nicer than the Mitchell's, that's for sure, but it's still very mild. Makes for a nice pint on a hot day, but I don't know whether I'd ride all the way into town to track it down. Verdict: best at the pub, or on-cask.

Russell's Blood Alley comes as a bit of a surprise. Frankly, my first whiff let me know that I'd buggered up the tasting order. Big hop aroma after the other three, more of a west-coast-style ESB. It's dry-hopped, natch, and there's some big pungencies from the Columbus here.

Overall, well-received, but the baby-IPA-style IBUs may have smashed our palate for the next contestant...

But it hasn't. Howe Sound Brewing's Baldwin and Cooper has some big shoes to fill, and I remember their Bailout as being quite light-drinking. This ESB isn't.

It's got the hops and the earthy, near-acrid finish you expect from West-Siiide stylings, but without the pungency, and with big malts adding a smooth brown bass line. Very drinkable in style. Nuttier than a certain political party. Front-runner for sure.

I thought I had taken a better picture. Oh well; if you aren't already familiar with Central City's unvarying artwork, then you must be living in a cave. In which case, ask a SEAL to describe it.

This beer got shafted. By that I mean that we should have had it about 3rd in rotation. Leaving it until after the Russell and the Baldwin just makes it look kind of half-hearted, when it's actually a very nice beer. Not really sure it's a true ESB, so much as the Red Racer IPA Training Wheels Edition, but it's certainly worth grabbing a six.

Recent champ at CAMRA's spring Fest-of-Ale, Moon Under Water's Blue Moon Bitter is a favourite after-work wind-down. Others, who'd been lucky enough to sample a few early editions preferred the old original, but I like the new tweaked brew.

Problem is, in bomber form, it loses a bit of that fresh hop tastiness. We were lucky enough to have a fresh-drawn growler for comparison, and you could tell the bottled beer had been blunted somewhat. Still very good.

Ah, Hildegard. Probably the best thing about this whole tasting was a better appreciation for what Driftwood has done with the Naughty Nun.

My initial impressions on Hildegard's initial release were, frankly, tinged with pining for the piney perfection of last year's model. That beer wasn't an ESB, but it was Extra Special.

Having gone through the lineup though, this year's Hildegard shows her strengths. It's a very nice west-coast ESB, and oh-so-bitter. Lip-smacking for sure.

But we weren't done yet. Ian showed up with an Elysian ESB (the Wise) which surprised and delighted all, especially Dan, who had some rather unpleasant things to say about their IPAs, and we also managed to cram in a couple of Propeller ESBs. East Coasters, how does Keith's survive with this stuff readily available? It's all about supply and command.

Lastly, I'm happy to report that Lighthouse's Overboard Imperial Pilsner isn't fubar. And I think we liked the Serendipity No. 3 that Dave brought.

But for the next four years of bitterness, there's only one beer for me. If you're at the brewpubs from whence they came, stick with the Spinnaker's, the Swan's and the MUW's. Try to at least sample the Blood Alley and the Hildegard before they disappear.

Baldwin and Cooper's though, that's the must-have.

Hot Damn of the Week: Naughty Hildegaard Returns

It's been a long three days. In a short period of time, I've viewed a dozen houses, worked a 12-hour shift (and another 6-hour one) taken the ferry four times, attended the press launch of the 2011 Vancouver International Auto Show and written an article on same.

I need a beer.

Not to worry though, as I've returned to the Island to the welcoming arms of these three lovely ladies. Yes, yes, I know: polygamy is bad. Unless you're Bill Paxton.

But Hildy is a nun after all, so I'm going for a holy trinity thing here. This is a beer I've been looking forward to all year. Every time Driftwood beer releases one of its excellent seasonals, there's a teeny-tiny part of my brain that goes, "Hey is it Hildegard yet? ...awwwww," like a dog perking up at hearing a car in the driveway, and then disappointedly realizing it's just the crazy, cat-owning neighbour.

But now she's here. And by here, I mean here, just to the left of the keyboard. So what's it like this year?

Hildegard is still an ESB, but I remember last year's as being quite floral and citrus-soaked, and this year's version marks a return to a more UK-style brew. It's certainly got some bite to it; there's more lingering bitterness here than at the Leno-O'Brien tenth anniversary reunion. I love it.

Driftwood Naughty Hildegard ESB
Recommended if:
-you're Robbie Coltrane or Eric Idle and the mob's after you
-you're looking for an ESB that wears fishnets
-you like a little bite from your beer

Not Recommended if:
-Feck! Nuns! Reverse!
-You prefer your ESBs to be just plain ESs
-you're a penguin. 'Cause that'd just be plain confusing.

Hot Damn of the Week: Red Racer ESB Falconer's Blend Cask

There is a certain element of scavenger hunt in any beer enthusiast, and I'm no exception. While we're pretty much spoilt for choice in Victoria with five or six local craft breweries all producing little brown bottles full of deliciousness, I read Red Racer's twitter about an upcoming cask at the Beagle with the same trembling anticipation as a methamphetamine addict unexpectedly finding a fifty dollar bill. Then I found out they were tapping it two hours before I got off work and I had a spaz-attack like that same meth-head realizing the fifty was actually monopoly money. I may have punched out an old lady.

Still, a man who can craft a sou'wester out of Post-Its is not about to be fettled by the constraints of space and time. Acting in secret, I first re-tweeted to the effect that the Beagle doesn't open until 9 p.m. on Tuesdays. Having stalled for time, I then sent forth nefarious agents to secure the precious like I lived in New Zealand and my name was Sauron.

Success (clearly)! The last pint in the place was waiting for me in a hidden fridge behind the bar, which should tell you two things:
1) It pays to have friends at your local pub.
and
2) The only way to gain access to good beer is lots and lots of drinking. Liver transplant, please!

So what about the beer? Well, Cask Ales are the holy grail of the brewing world: mention an upcoming cask to a member of the Campaign For Real Ale, and they'll immediately have to sit down or hold a cushion in front of them to hide a sudden concupiscence. As such, I was on that isht like Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible IV (the one where he brainwashes ex-cast-members of Dawson's Creek before harvesting their souls).

And my wire-assisted gymnastics were worth it: Central City does not disappoint. The smooth, dry-hopped tweaking of their excellent ESB was an Extra Special Bitter indeed. Apparently, the cask sold out in just over an hour, which is pretty good for a town where everybody has to be in bed with a Barbara Cartwright novel by seven.

The Central boys are hitting the bars with tactical casks regularly. Add 'em to your twitter-feed and check off that box on your scavenger hunt list. Getting your picture taken with a policeman optional.